wtf is with this psychic octopus anyway?

seriously though, every time i turn on the television it's there. i know it's real because the backpackers saw it as well.
the camera shot is always focused up close whilst the octopus is wriggling around, german flag in the background - apparently it picks the games they win/lose.
psychic
...

anyhoo it makes me feel uncomfortable.

speaking of uncomfortable...i ate half a plate of cabbage last night. . . . i knew what the consequences WOULD be, whilst consuming said cabbage - BUT it had been soooooooooo long since i'd had it and it tasted JUST LIKE my baba sex's cabbage......so i consumed ALL of it...

i woke up this morning and thought there was something wrong with my vision...but no...it was just the ridiculous amount of gas that had been expelled into my room

i have no fucking idea how i am going to get through today.

i am actually really glad that i will be outside for the most part cleaning up after the storm.

ye see...it's things like THIS that make me realise why i am still single.

........................................................................................

if i was walking down the street and bumped into myself, i would totally grab me by the hand, spin me around kiss myself on the cheek
then i would give myself my phone number, ask me to call me whenever i felt like going for a lacto-free milkshake and then do the shimmie, walkie away backwards, with that look of enchantment/i'm totally going to be awesome to you look in my eye

meanwhile, back at the mining lodge...

so the governement workers have commenced their work-out sessions at the gym. you should see them, like little pigglets on the walkie-machine

after they work out they go straight to dinner and then eat heaps of cream desserts.

i make a point of asking which dinner items are low in fat whilst standing at the bainmarie

they hate me, it's obvious. i don't hate them though, i just don't UNDERSTAND them.
there is a slight wanting to understand them, however i just can't concentrate, am void of all patience when they do start talking to me.

i seriously think i am a employment-status-racist

...



my affair with the serbian and the chef is pending further investigation . they just bore me. maybe i do have asperger's.........i'm really not that great at identifying mathematical equations, et cetera et cetera though......perhaps i have just misplaced a important part of the human body, usually referred to as "feelings" which isn't really part of the human body, per say more of the human emoticon.


perhaps i left them in my bottom bureau drawer.


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now finally, to end with an extract from the google itself (on one butt cheek bigger than the other)


So there you are, checking your arse in the mirror as you do each night, when suddenly you realise one butt check is bigger than the other.

Cold clammy hands and beads of sweat form on your forehead. Panic! You are due on stage to show off those rock hard glutes in only a few months.

Breath deeply and relax … help is at hand!

Korean designer Yoon-Hee Kim says his right butt was larger and much more powerful than his left butt so he designed the balance chair.

Sitting on this chair requires you to utilise your botty muscles equally to keep your balance. Why? Because inventive Yoon-Hee has put the seat on a pivot. If you don’t fire up the old booty muscles, you fall off.

And Yoon-Hee? Well, his butt cheeks are now equal sized thanks to the chair, and he has retired a rich man to show them off on the beaches of the Bahamas.
refer to pic at top of post please.................